Though this is my first formal piece for the newest, shall we call it, quaint travel blog hitting the web, the questionable adventures of jean and jenn, many of you may know me as the "hot one" in nearly every photo on the blog. Recently I had the opportunity to sit down with the blog's creators and try to figure out why the hell they think anyone cares about their travels, their thoughts or their very existence.
Taylor: tell me the inspiration behind this blog
Jeannie: so it all started when we left our fancy hotel and went to sleep in the airport. We'd awoken that morning to the jarring realization that we're poor so instead of shelling out for a real bed like fools, we decided the benches at a cafe in the airport would suffice.
Jenn: as it turns out the waitress at said cafe disagreed. She violently shook us on multiple cc assigns noting our sleepy state and lack of shoes but never kicking us out. She repeatedly reminded us that "this is a restaurant" as though we'd forgotten. Finally we did what all the greats do we slept on the floor of an airport post office.
Taylor: ok, while this a gripping tale, it has nothing to so with my question. How, or really we're all wondering why, did this blog come to life?
Jeannie: oh right, so we woke up a few hours before our flight and made our way through security. I went through with no problems but things were a little more complicated for Jenn.
Jenn: on a scale of one to awesome, it was not. While most people went to the desk, showed their documents and moved along I was stopped and told "you're a problem for Interpol" not "this is a problem for Interpol" but me personally.
Taylor: look I know you really want to tell your airport story but I'm interviewing you about the blog's birth, can we stay in track ladies? Specifically Jeannie can you please help me get Jenn on track.
Jeannie: speaking of getting Jenn on track I was waiting on the other side of immigration as I watched two large men escort Jenn from Interpol to a back office. She made a face at me that said "fuuuuuuuuuuuuuu...."
Taylor: Jenn can we get Jeannie on track?
Jenn: speaking of tracks, immigration officials were really going off the rails trying to simultaneously deport and hold me. And I don't mean cuddling. I was told that I could pay to go through, just a cool $800. So I finally broke down and sent Jeannie running toward the ATM to pull out money.
Jeannie: between two ATMs I got $400, 400 soles and winded. Unfortunately none of this was enough.
Jenn: I handed the money to the woman and she looked at me and simply said "falta"
Taylor: we're seriously falta on you answering the right question. Come on I'm begging y ---
Jenn: speaking of begging while Jeannie was running the ATM gauntlet, I was given the stellar advice to beg for the money from my "countrymen"
Taylor: wait, she told you beg? What the f---
Jeannie: Taylor please, can we get back to what's really important? I completed a marathon on my forth lap back to the terminal to try and change our flight
Jenn: meanwhile I'm being told that Jeannie can only leave the airport in a plane so I try to buy her a ticket from Lima to Lima but no dice.
Jeannie: we eventually work things out with two different sets of documents saying that we are, in fact, allowed to leave the airport.
Taylor: where are the documents that allow me to leave this conversation?
Jeannie: Taylor...ok? ...just, c'mon.
Jenn: fast forward a number of hours and we find ourselves back in the airport somewhere between security and immigration...again. A nice guy had helped us get plane tickets several hours early despite being on standby, and my passport had a freshly stamped visa. Apparently, though, it needed a different stamp.
Taylor: what's with Peru and stamps?
Jeannie: so this one we stick together but lose more and more hope with every passing second until we are sitting in a back hallway in immigration wallowing in a pit of self despair.
Jenn: while we are trying to figure out how to say "skrew it" and leave the airport, Jeannie made a face at an old man that even broke my heart.
Taylor: but you don't have a heart.
Jenn: exactly.
Jeannie: in a last ditch effort, we follow this old man to a desk where he passes is of to another old man and this younger dude who was super cool.
Jenn: then, suddenly, like a lady stallion of justice, comes our savior. She forcefully tells the other two, "these are volunteers, we have I let them pass no matter what. Just do it"
Jeannie: after a few breathtaking moments where the exit stamp almost touches the passport, Jenn finally is free. We go to our savior, and she says, "go girls,run!"
Taylor: omg did you guys, like, hug and kiss and cry???
Jeannie: you know, Taylor, you can really be a bitch sometimes.
Jenn: kind of like Peruvian immigrations
Taylor: well, there you have it: the senseless ramblings of two people who probably belong in an insane asylum.
Jenn: but this really happened--
Taylor: sorry, Jenn. Go put your shoes on, you can't sleep here, this is a restaurant. Folks, if we have learned anything from this, it is that you probably shouldn't run through airport security and that making sad faces at old men can sometimes help.
